RIP Pigeon

So I ran over a pigeon today after journalism class. I was going along Gerrard... the pigeon was there, and I thought it would do the normal thing and jump onto the side walk as I was passing. Instead, as I moved to the left, so did it... I couldn't move any further because of a passing car- and I was in such shock... anyway. I ran it over.

Yelped and stopped my bike. I had my gloves on and picked up the poor thing with my big wool gloves- I had no idea what to do. It's head was mangled. Like, it was missing an eye. It was right in front of the covenant house- and the group of kids outside where shocked I stopped. I could hear them... 'she ran it over... she stopped... what is she going to do?'

I am a vegetarian and I haven't caused harm like this since I killed that frog at the cottage when I was 8 by mistake. I just didn't know what to do. No body fixes pigeons. It wasn't very fixable. It was in pain.

An awesome guy, Nick, came up and asked me what I was going to do. I guess he could tell by my shocked face I had no idea... I knew I had to kill it, but I how? I told him I just couldn't do it, I was a vegetarian... and I started to cry. I was paralyzed on the cold dirty street at Gerrard and Yonge holding this poor pathetic paralyzed rat with feathers. But the bird is life- you know? We're all a part of the worlds energy. It's the same as you or me, we're all in this fucked up world together.

Nick took my gloves, took the bird, and tried to knock it out with car exhaust. It didn't work. He took it to the alley and I had to close my eyes and shut my ears realllllll hard. It went into a plastic garbage bag on top of a heap.

I feel really shitty. I feel really lucky Nick came along. He was from a family that hunted and could do what I couldn't. He works at a waffle house and he invited me in for waffles soon. I may bring him a plant- he told me he was just about to move.

I went to the Urbane Herbivore to get some chocolate. My friend Jill was there with her boss Steve and she was supper awesome and listened to me freak out. I felt like I was there to absolve my sins- telling my story of the pigeon to one of the most hard-core vegans in the city. Taz called and sympathized with me. We've come to the conclusion that it was obviously suicidal and I was the victim in all this. (Not really but it makes me feel better.)

Then I went to Chip's and he gave me a hug. You need 5 a day to be happy.

Maybe the pigeon just wanted a hug.